Getting cheated on is awful, isn’t it?
It’s one of the most hurtful and damaging things that can happen to a person in a relationship.
You might think it’s easier to end things than to try to forgive them. But guess what? Sometimes it’s worth it to stay together and repair the relationship.
Here are 15 tips on how to get over being cheated on and stay together with your partner.
1) Give yourself time
If you’ve decided to immediately exit the relationship, you should know that rushing into a decision can affect how well you deal with the situation.
Give yourself time to grieve, and to let your emotions run their course.
If you’re thinking about leaving your partner, it may be a good idea to do some self-reflection first. You may realize that the relationship is worth saving, even though it’s been hurt by infidelity.
But here’s the thing:
It’s hard to get over being cheated on because it feels like you’ve been betrayed. You might feel abandoned, angry, and hurt.
It’s normal to feel this way, but you shouldn’t let yourself be consumed by these feelings.
That’s why you should give yourself time to process your feelings and try not to act on impulse. If you want to end things with your partner immediately, cool off first before saying or doing anything rash.
Let me explain why:
When you’ve been cheated on, it can be easy to blame yourself.
You might ask yourself what you did wrong and how you could have prevented this from happening. However, you can’t control how your partner behaves, and you can’t force them to stay with you if they don’t want to.
Why?
Because you need time to heal and process what happened before you can figure out how to move forward with your relationship.
So, give yourself time to cool off. You’ll feel better if you sleep on it before making a decision.
2) Be honest with your partner and yourself
You might be tempted to lie about how you feel or about what happened.
But lying to your partner or yourself won’t help the situation. In fact, it could make things worse.
So what should you do?
You have to be honest and express your feelings sincerely.
The truth is that if you want your relationship to survive, you both need to be honest and straightforward. You can’t ignore the cheating and hope that it will go away on its own.
You need to be honest with your partner and ask them about their infidelity.
If you are cheated on, you also need to be honest with yourself and not try to justify your partner’s actions or hope that they will change. Instead, you need to acknowledge the relationship dynamics that led to the infidelity in the first place.
Before you can move forward with your relationship, you need to be honest with yourself and your partner about what happened and why. If you’ve been cheated on, you need to understand why your partner chose to behave in such a hurtful way.
Even if you don’t fully understand their actions, you need to acknowledge that they chose to betray you. Only then can you and your partner move forward.
So, instead of hiding how you feel, try to be honest with yourself and your partner. It’s important that you communicate your feelings and thoughts with them in order to work through the situation.
Don’t hold anything back!
It’s time to get real and tell them exactly how you feel. Be honest about why you’re hurt, and let them know what they can do to help you get through this difficult time.
3) Empower yourself and develop your personal power
Although you’ve already decided that you want to stay together with your partner after they cheated on you, it’s important that you take control of the situation.
You need to be strong and empowered, and not let your partner walk all over you. Don’t let them push you around or make all the decisions.
You need to take charge and decide what you want to do with your relationship. You have the power here – not them!
Even if they cheated on you, they don’t have any right to treat you badly or make decisions for both of you. They can’t expect that their cheating will be swept under the rug so quickly.
But how can you empower yourself after being cheated on?
Let me share the secret:
Begin with yourself. Stop looking for some magical advice or external forces to help you get over your breakup.
Deep down, you know this isn’t going to work.
And that’s the reason you need to find your personal power and stand up for yourself.
I learned this from the shaman Rudá Iandê. He has found ways to teach people how to release their creative potential and balance their lives as a result. And you know what?
Rudá’s incredible technique has already helped thousands of people recover from their tough relationships.
In his excellent free video, you have an amazing opportunity to get introduced to his new approach that combines ancient shamanic techniques with a modern-day twist.
So if you’re ready to accept the challenge, unlock your endless potential, and empower yourself, start right now by checking out his genuine advice.
Here’s a link to the free video again.
4) Reconnect by doing something you love together
Have you ever tried to talk to your partner about the issues you’re having with them and it ended in an argument or a fight?
I know how frustrating it is when you try to communicate with the person you love, but they don’t seem to hear what you’re saying.
And then, before you know it, the conversation turns into an argument. This can be even more devastating if you know your partner cheated on you.
But there’s a way to avoid this. A way that will allow you and your partner to reconnect and get closer again – without getting into any fights!
You see, when two people are in a relationship together, there are certain things they need to do together in order for their relationship to work. For example:
- Go to dinner together
- Go dancing together
- Go grocery shopping together
- Take a trip together, etc.
Now you might think that you can’t do any of these things with your partner after they have cheated on you. But the simple truth is that this is the only functional way to forgive and forget.
The thing is that when you reconnect with your partner by doing something you love together, you can slowly begin to forgive them. And before you know it, you’ll be able to look back at the difficult time of your breakup and laugh about it.
If you and your partner can start doing some of these things again – even if it’s just for 30 minutes or an hour each day – it can help rekindle the fire between you two and bring the passion back into your relationship again.
So, just watch your favorite comedy to experience an outdoor activity you both enjoy. This will allow you to move past the pain and negative emotions associated with infidelity and start rebuilding your relationship.
5) Commit to working on the relationship together
Have you ever thought about how you and your partner can work on your relationship?
Maybe you’ve never even thought about it because you’ve always believed that the person you love will never hurt you. But the truth is that relationships take time, effort, and commitment to make them successful.
And if you’re going to commit to working on your relationship with the person who cheated on you, there are a few things that I recommend doing.
First of all, don’t go back to the same routine that led to your breakup in the first place.
You see, if your partner cheated on you because they were unhappy with their life and they weren’t getting what they needed from their relationship with you, then it’s likely that they’ll cheat again.
You should instead try to communicate with your partner clearly and see why they cheated on you. If they cheated on you because they weren’t getting what they needed from you, then that’s something you can work on together.
For example:
If your partner feels like they need more attention from you, then try to give them more attention.
The point is that if your relationship is worth saving, then it’s worth making some changes so that both of you can get what you need out of it.
Even though you may feel hurt and betrayed by your partner, you need to remember that they are still the same person they were before they cheated.
Your partner has hurt you, but they are not a hurtful person. It’s easy to misplace the blame and think that your partner is malicious or cruel.
However, most of the time, people cheat because they’re unhappy and want to find a way to feel better. Your partner may not have found another person because they wanted to hurt you.
They may have done it because they didn’t know how else to make themselves happy. It’s easy to blame your partner for cheating, but it’s more helpful to look at why they felt the need to do it.
Only then will they be able to resist the urge to cheat.
6) Discover why your partner cheated
Ever tried to identify the exact reason why your partner cheated?
If you’re wondering how to get over being cheated on, you probably tried to understand why your partner cheated on you.
Was it because they didn’t love you enough? Was it because they were unhappy with their life? Did you have a gut feeling they were cheating?
Or was it because they just wanted to have fun?
Sometimes the real reason why partners cheat is that they feel a lack of attention from their loved ones and /or they are not getting what they want from their partners.
They might feel that they are being taken for granted and that’s why they seek attention from other people.
They might also want to feel appreciated by their loved ones and may try to look elsewhere when their needs aren’t met.
Just think about it.
What if your partner doesn’t feel satisfied in the relationship? What if your partner is not getting what they want from you?
There’s no denying that cheating on someone doesn’t have an excuse, but if you want to rebuild your relationship with your partner, you both should address the issue.
So here’s what you should do: while it may be difficult to do, you need to try and understand why your partner felt the need to cheat on you.
Sometimes, people cheat because they are unhappy in a relationship and want to leave it.
Other times, people cheat because they are unhappy with themselves and want to feel better about themselves.
In both cases, it’s important to figure out why your partner cheated so you can understand what led to the infidelity in the first place.
You need to think about why your partner was unhappy in the relationship. If they are unhappy with their intimate life, their finances, or their communication with you, you need to think about ways you can change those parts of the relationship together.
But remember: regardless of why they cheated on you, you don’t have a single reason to blame yourself for this situation.
7) Set boundaries for moving forward together
Okay, you already have some ideas about why your partner cheated on you.
But now, it’s time to move forward together.
You may have a lot of questions about your future together as a couple.
For example, do you want to work on the relationship? Do you want to talk about what happened and rebuild your trust? Do you want to get back together with your partner or just go separate ways?
If you’re wondering how to get over being cheated on, the first thing that’s important to you is setting boundaries for moving forward together.
What do I mean?
Well, when you’re going through a difficult moment in a relationship, it can be easy to just want to get over it and move on.
And the first step is setting boundaries for moving forward together. Boundaries are rules or limits about how you will approach this problem in your relationship.
Let’s be honest once again:
Cheating is a betrayal of trust and your relationship. It shows that your partner is not committed to you and does not value you as a person.
If your partner doesn’t change their behavior and commit to being faithful, they are likely to cheat again. You need to set boundaries to show your partner that you won’t tolerate being cheated on again. You need to set boundaries so you can feel safe in your relationship.
But remember that there are no universal rules for setting boundaries. It really depends on your individual situation and how you feel about the problem at hand.
Some people may want to talk about what happened and rebuild their trust; others may not want any contact with their partner at all.
You need to think about what will work best for your future as a couple and set those boundaries accordingly.
8) Focus on the relationship and what’s good about it
While it may seem silly, you need to focus on the positive aspects of your relationship so you can feel more confident in it.
Why?
Well, because every relationship has good parts. You need to focus on those aspects of your relationship and what’s good about it.
For example, you may have a great connection with your partner and have a lot in common. You may have been together for a long time and feel like you’re in sync with each other.
You may feel like you are friends as well as lovers. You may feel like you understand each other really well and can talk about anything with one another.
And you know what else?
You might feel like the two of you are on the same page about what kind of relationship you want to have together – whether it’s serious, casual, long-term, short-term…whatever!
You can do this by writing down 10 things you love about your partner and your relationship.
The result?
This can help you feel more confident about your relationship and less focused on the pain of infidelity. It will also help you look for the good in your relationship and figure out how to improve the bad parts.
What’s more, you can also look for ways you can offer support to your partner.
They may feel angry and resentful after the cheating, and you need to help them through these emotions. This will help you show that you are committed to making up for your mistakes and can rebuild trust in your relationship.
9) Don’t blame yourself for being cheated on
Let me take a wild guess.
After you were cheated on, you probably took a good look at yourself and wondered what you did wrong.
You might have blamed yourself for being cheated on and thought about all the ways you could have prevented it.
But here’s the thing:
You can’t control someone else’s actions. You can only take responsibility for your own behavior.
If you want to prevent being cheated on in the future, then focus on your actions – not your partner’s!
For example, if your partner is cheating because they are unhappy in their life, that has nothing to do with you.
But if they are cheating because they feel like they are not getting enough attention from you, that has something to do with your relationship and how much attention you give them.
When it comes to preventing infidelity in the future, focus on what you can do to prevent it – not what your partner can do!
Why?
Well, it’s because there’s no way you can predict or manage other people’s actions. They may say they will never cheat on you, but that doesn’t mean they will.
So if you want to avoid being cheated on in the future, focus on yourself and your relationship and how you can improve it.
Remember not to beat yourself up for being cheated on because it’s not your fault that this happened to you.
If you’ve been blaming yourself for the cheating, try not to do that anymore because it won’t do anything but make things worse for you and your relationship.
Choose love instead of self-hate and choose forgiveness instead of blame when dealing with how to get over being cheated on as a couple.
10) Talk about it until you’re both satisfied
Some couples just want to sweep cheating under the rug and move on without addressing it head-on, but guess what?
That’s not a good idea!
If you want to rebuild trust and improve your relationship, you need to get everything out in the open.
You can do that by talking about how to get over being cheated on until you’re both satisfied.
Let me guess:
You have probably heard the saying that communication is the key to a successful relationship.
Well, that saying is true because communication is the foundation of any healthy relationship.
The reason is that discussing your concerns with your partner helps you connect with them and understand what they are thinking and feeling.
But it also helps you to be honest with each other, so you don’t have to hide your feelings and thoughts from them.
This is important because hiding your feelings about an issue doesn’t mean it will go away – it means it will get worse!
But when you talk about an issue, then the problem becomes smaller because the more you talk about it, the less intense it becomes. This makes dealing with how to get over being cheated on easier for both of you.
When talking about an issue, try not to blame each other or bring up old arguments. If you do this, then the conversation will just lead to another argument, and nothing will be solved!
Instead of blaming each other or bringing up old arguments, focus on finding a solution that makes both of you happy.
11) Don’t rush into a decision
Have you ever felt so overwhelmed by the thought of being alone that you didn’t think clearly and made a decision that you later regretted?
That’s what can happen if you try to make your decision about how to get over being cheated on too quickly.
If you rush into a decision, then you can make a mistake that could ruin your relationship or even cause irreparable damage.
Why?
Because what feels right today might not seem right tomorrow, so don’t make any decisions right away.
Instead of making a rash decision about how to get over being cheated on, take some time to think things through. Then, when you’ve had time to think things through, decide what it is that you want out of your relationship.
If there are things that you want out of the relationship, then work towards getting those things before deciding whether or not the relationship is worth saving.
And if there’s nothing that you want out of the relationship, then decide whether or not it’s worth saving anyway. Either way, don’t rush into making a decision about how to get over being cheated on until after giving yourself time to think about it.
Take your time and mull things over before making any moves.
You might end up making a rash decision that you later regret, so take your time while dealing with the aftermath of the cheating.
12) Don’t try to get revenge
If you’ve already decided to get revenge on your partner, you should know that it’s not going to help you improve anything at all.
I know it hurts really bad when someone cheats on you. And I know it’s tempting to think that getting revenge is the best way to deal with it…
But here’s the thing: you don’t want to stoop down to your partner’s level by cheating or trying to get back at them for what they did.
Why? Because this will only cause more damage to your relationship in the long run!
Instead of trying to get revenge, save yourself some time and energy by working hard on improving your own behavior and building a better relationship with your partner.
To be exact:
- You won’t feel better
- Your relationship won’t improve
- It won’t teach your partner a lesson
So why do people get revenge on their partners?
They don’t feel like they can get justice any other way. They feel like they’re in the wrong and that what happened to them was unfair. They want to get back at their partner for cheating, but they can’t think of a way to do it, so they decide to take revenge instead.
But revenge just makes things worse. It doesn’t teach your partner a lesson and it doesn’t fix anything. It only makes you feel worse about yourself, so don’t take revenge on your partner just because you’re angry or upset.
Instead of trying to hurt your partner by getting revenge, try doing something that makes you feel better instead.
You might not be able to make up for the pain that your partner has caused you, but you can at least make yourself feel better by doing something good for yourself.
13) Take time alone to heal
One of the most important tips to getting over being cheated on and moving on is to take time for yourself to heal.
What I mean here is that you need some time alone to get over your partner’s betrayal and start feeling better about yourself again.
After you and your partner have talked about what happened and why you need to take time alone to heal and decide what to do next. If you’ve been cheated on, you may feel a strong urge to break up with your partner and end the relationship.
But you know what?
It’s important to resist this urge and think carefully about the best course of action.
For this, you need to take time to heal from the betrayal and work on feeling better about yourself. This may mean doing things like talking to a therapist or reading self-help books about dealing with cheating.
You also need to focus on your emotions and how you feel about the betrayal.
So don’t do anything that’ll give you an excuse to stay in contact with your ex, like going out with friends or spending time with family members.
You need some time alone so you can focus on healing from the pain of being cheated on.
14) Take care of yourself
Now I want to tell you that being cheated on doesn’t mean that you should neglect your own needs or the things that you want to do.
Being cheated on is a horrible betrayal, but that doesn’t mean that you should punish yourself by giving up on your own happiness or well-being.
The pain of being cheated on can be overwhelming, but try to focus on doing the things that make you feel good and help you move forward.
So don’t give up on your goals or stop taking care of yourself, even when it feels like it would be easier to give up and let go.
You deserve to feel good about yourself, so take care of yourself by doing the things that make you happy.
Take care of yourself and don’t let the pain of being cheated on stop you from living your life or doing what makes you happy. Take some time for yourself and focus on healing from the betrayal in whatever way works best for you.
You may feel like you can’t do anything right now, but that’s not true. You can still do things that are good for you.
For example, you can go to the gym and work on your body, or eat a healthy diet and work on feeling better about yourself. No matter how bad you feel right now, it’s important to nurture yourself and do things that make you feel better.
15) Discuss your problem with your loved one
And the final tip I’m about to share with you is to discuss your problem with your loved one.
If you have a supportive friend or family member, it can be helpful to talk about what happened and get some advice on how to handle it.
So don’t keep this a secret! Tell someone you trust that you’ve been cheated on and ask for their advice.
People who care about you will want to help, so don’t hesitate to reach out for support if you need it.
That way, you’ll look at this problem from different perspectives and see how you can get the most out of it.
Final words
All in all, the moment you realize your partner has cheated on you is undoubtedly one of the worst in your relationship.
Many people assume the only response to being cheated on is to break up and go their separate ways.
But as you can see, even though staying together after being cheated on isn’t easy, it is possible and worthwhile.
So, try to keep these 15 tips in mind and make the best of your situation.
