Let’s face it — divorce is never a fun process.
Sometimes people start thinking about splitting up for the long haul, but then something happens and they have to put those plans on hold.
In other words, we can say that these people have second thoughts about their pending divorce as they were not ready to end their marriage just yet.
However, this is often easier said than done as you can’t force someone to stay married to you if they no longer want to be with you.
So how will you know if your wife is reconsidering your divorce?
Here are 9 signs that might help you figure if your wife changes her stand about ending things with you.
1) She’s suddenly more interested in your life
When a wife is changing her mind about divorce, she suddenly becomes more interested in your life.
She wants to know what you’re up to and what your goals are. She may even start asking you for your advice.
This can be a clear sign that she’s starting to rethink her decision to divorce.
If she’s really reconsidering, don’t take it for granted.
She could change her mind at any time; so, don’t get comfortable and think you’ve got this one in the bag just yet.
You should also keep in mind that she might not be fully committed to divorce yet.
Her decision might just be based on emotion at this point, and she may not feel ready to officially end the marriage just yet.
Be patient with her and show her how much you care about her by being there for her emotionally as much as possible during this difficult time.
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2) She’s more affectionate
When the going gets tough and tensions rise in a relationship, one thing you might notice is that your wife starts to pay more attention to you.
She might even initiate kisses or hugs more often – not every day, but when it’s needed.
Maybe you don’t miss these times at first and think that she’s being overly affectionate just to get close to you.
Eventually though, these moments will become more frequent, and notice yourself being affected by her touch.
If your wife has been distant for a while, but now she’s giving you some extra hugs and kisses, that’s a good sign.
It may be difficult to tell if it’s a conscious decision on her part or just a result of being in a better mood.
However, if you sit down after the hug and talk about why she’s been distant lately, there’s a good chance that she’ll open up to you more than usual.
She may be changing her mind about divorce, even if she doesn’t realize it yet.
When a spouse is still committed to the relationship, it can be much easier to work out problems and make compromises.
3) She’s started discussing plans for the future
A wife who is starting to change her mind about divorce needs to be sure that she is thinking about all of the consequences of a divorce before she makes any final decision.
This is especially true for couples who have children because they are likely to face many challenges if they end their marriage.
One of the most important considerations when deciding whether or not to get a divorce is whether or not you want to raise children as a single parent.
If you decide that you do, it’s essential to make sure that you have a plan in place for raising your kids.
You should also be prepared to deal with the financial consequences of being single, such as paying higher costs for daycare or having to cover the costs yourself.
However, she’s talking about the future and seems to be more optimistic about it.
That might mean a lot of small, disjointed conversations instead of long-term planning or goals for your future together.
If she’s mentioning something you might do in the future or ways you can fix your marriage, that’s a good thing!
It shows that she’s not giving up on you or the marriage – but just don’t push her on it too much if she seems hesitant.
You never know how good or bad a day she’s had, and moving forward may be too much pressure for her right now.
4) She’s more responsive to your needs
A wife who no longer wants a divorce can be a very different person from the one you may have known before.
She may be more responsive to your needs and even more willing to help you with the children.
And she may also be less likely to be quick to anger or lash out at you when things don’t go her way, which can make her a much better partner in all kinds of ways.
So if you’re wondering whether your wife is “changing her mind” about divorce, it could actually just mean that she’s becoming more like the person she used to be before she decided to end your marriage.
A wife who no longer wants a divorce is more likely to be responsive to your needs because she knows that you still want the marriage to work.
She may also feel more willing to help around the house because she knows that you really do want her there.
Maybe she is starting to see that you are doing your best to keep her.
Earn back their trust by showing them that you can change.
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5) She’s initiated more physical contact
If your wife has been giving you more hugs or getting in bed with you more often, that’s a really good sign.
It’s hard to tell if she’s doing it because she wants you or because she’s trying to make you want her more.
If she kisses you and smiles, though, then that’s a healthy sign that she might be trying to make things better.
It shows that she’s not giving up on you or the marriage.
It doesn’t even have to be an intimate touch, as long as it’s something more than she’s used to doing.
If your wife has always seemed a bit distant, but she initiates a kiss or touches you in some way when you’re watching TV or something, that’s a good sign!
While initiating physical contact does not necessarily mean that a couple is staying together, it does show that the spouse is willing to engage more intimately with their partner.
This could be because they are trying to show their spouse that they are still open to continued involvement in the relationship or they want their spouse to feel like they are still interested in remaining together.
She might not be ready to admit it yet, but if you bring the conversation back up again in another day or so, she might feel more comfortable talking with you about what’s going on.
6) She’s more communicative
Communication is key to any divorce proceeding.
When a wife is changing her mind about divorce, she’s more communicative.
If your wife has been talking with you more or seems to want to talk more, that’s a good sign.
After a fight like the one you had, most couples go into standoff mode and stop talking to each other.
You may be able to tell if your wife is changing her mind about divorce by how much she’s talking, even if she’s not saying anything important.
She’s not as defensive and oftentimes is more open to hearing your side of things.
If she seems more willing to talk than usual – or tries to start conversations with you – that’s a good thing!
She also might be talking about the future and seems to be more optimistic about it.
That might mean a lot of small, disjointed conversations instead of long-term planning or goals for your future together.
If she’s mentioning something you might do in the future or ways you can fix your marriage, that’s a good thing!
It shows that she’s not giving up on you or the marriage – but just don’t push her on it too much if she seems hesitant.
You never know how good or bad a day she’s had, and moving forward may be too much pressure for her right now.
7) She’s started to take more interest in your hobbies
A person’s hobbies can reveal much about their character.
If your wife offers to join you when you’re working on a project or wants to go out with you more, that’s a very good sign.
This can be a little harder to gauge if she has a hobby of her own, but if she seems more interested in yours and treats it as something she’d like to try – even for just an afternoon or evening – that’s positive.
This can be a really hard time for a lot of people to be able to do all the small things they’ve done alone at home separately, but it means that your wife wants to try taking care of you.
There are a few different reasons why your wife could be doing this.
She could be trying to keep you happy so that you don’t want a divorce.
She could also be trying to avoid being lonely, or she could be doing it because she misses you and wants to spend more time with you.
It can take some time for her to get used to it, but showing an interest in what makes you happy will definitely show signs of change from her side of things.
8) She’s trying to comfort you or make you feel better when you’re having a hard time.
If your wife is trying to cheer you up when you’re upset about something – like a bad day at work or losing football pool money – that’s a good sign!
This shows that she cares about how you feel, even if it is for only that one situation.
It could also show that she wants to try making things better for the both of you because she no longer wants to end your marriage.
If she says something positive – or even just a “good job” or “you’re doing better than I thought” – that’s very important because it shows that she thinks there’s hope for your marriage!
It could just mean that she’s being nice to you because of how you’ve been acting recently, but if so many other things about her have changed and she’s acting differently this may be a sign that there is hope for you two in the future.
She’s more willing to give the relationship another try.
And lastly.
9) She told you she wants to work on your relationship.
A woman who wants to work on her marriage can be a sign she’s not ready to end things.
Although this could be a sign that she’s simply trying to keep you from leaving, it could also mean that she really does want to give things another go.
If your wife is being positive about the future of your marriage and asks you if there is something she can do or change about herself or herself as a person, you may be able to talk about what will make things even better between the two of you.
If she’s willing to go through counseling, consider giving her some space while she works on things.
If she just needs more time before making a decision, try giving her that—but don’t give up on her.
Give her space, but don’t give up on trying to save the marriage.
Sometimes we just need someone else to come along and remind us that things are actually getting better, and when you have that positive reinforcement – even from the person who left – it can make all the difference in how well your marriage will recover.
This can be a good thing if you’re ready for it!
Conclusion
The signs on this list are just few of the many out there. I’m sure there are other signs that your wife wants to stay.
What things have you noticed yourself that made you feel like your wife had changed her mind and wanted to stay married?
If you’re facing a divorce right now and these things seem overwhelming right now, know that you aren’t alone.
You’re not the only one who is confused and unsure – it’s okay to ask your wife and seem lost as well.
No matter what these small signs mean, they can at least give you some hope that things will get better!
If your wife wants a second chance with you and is willing to put in the work to make things work again, then you should take advantage of this offer.
Saving the relationship when you’re the only one trying is tough but it doesn’t always mean your relationship should be scrapped.
Because if you still love your spouse, what you really need is a plan of attack to mend your marriage.
Many things can slowly infect a marriage—distance, lack of communication, and sexual issues. If not dealt with correctly, these problems can metamorphosize into infidelity and disconnectedness.
When someone asks me for advice to help save failing marriages, I always recommend relationship expert and divorce coach Brad Browning.
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The strategies Brad reveals in it are extremely powerful and might be the difference between a “happy marriage” and an “unhappy divorce”.
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