When a couple decides to separate, it’s not always the end of their relationship.
In fact, many couples who have been through a separation find their way back to each other.
But how do you know if your relationship will last?
This article explains 18 positive signs during separation that predict reconciliation. Let’s take a look.
1) You no longer fight all the time
The first positive sign during separation that predicts reconciliation is when you no longer fight all the time.
If you and your partner manage to talk without arguing, the chances are that you will be able to work out any differences between you.
At first, you might have had a lot of arguments, but now you are able to work around the issues that you had and resolve them in a peaceful manner.
So if you’re not fighting all the time anymore, this is a very positive sign.
It means that you both have sufficient self-control and communication skills to manage your disagreements without letting them escalate into a full-blown fight.
It also means that you’re both willing to put an end to your disagreements.
If you’re still fighting, it may indicate that the issues are very deep and that you will be at loggerheads for a long time.
2) You talk and listen to each other
The next positive sign during separation that predicts reconciliation is when you communicate with each other in an open, honest way.
You don’t just say whatever comes to your mind. Instead, you keep what you say as close to the truth as possible.
Of course, there will be misunderstandings once in a while, but you remain open to listening to what the other person has to say.
You really want to understand where they’re coming from. You don’t always have to agree with your partner, but you want to understand their point of view.
And if you do disagree with them, you’re able to express yourself in a way that isn’t hostile. Your partner listens when you talk and vice versa.
3) You have forgiven each other
Here’s the third positive sign during separation that predicts reconciliation.
You’ve forgiven each other for the mistakes you’ve made.
You both have the ability to let go of what’s behind you and move forward (hopefully) together.
This means that both of you have moved on from the anger and resentment of the past.
You’ve both accepted what happened in the past and tried to understand where your partner was coming from by putting yourselves in their position.
You may still be angry and upset with your partner, but you don’t hold it against them anymore.
However, if you still hold a grudge against your partner, it shows that you’re stuck on what happened in the past.
Holding a grudge will only create new problems and make it even more difficult for you to work things out together.
4) A relationship coach can give you real clarity
So, how can you tell if there’s hope for reconciliation in your relationship, especially during separation?
The signs in this article will definitely help you calculate your chances. But, it wouldn’t hurt to ask for professional advice.
When I was really confused about where my relationship was going, I was put in touch with one of the coaches at Relationship Hero. They are specialized in all matters of love and were able to help me see my situation clearly.
Why do I think they can help you, too? Because they can guide you in the right direction when it comes to your partner and the possibility of reconciliation.
Not only did my coach impress me with his wisdom and communication skills, but he shared some amazing techniques to help me identify my mistakes and fix them.
If they could point me to practical solutions, I’m confident they could help you too!
5) You’ve both changed
Here’s the next positive sign during separation that predicts reconciliation:
You’ve both changed for the better. You’ve matured as a person.
For example, you no longer make empty promises whenever your partner is upset with you.
You’re honest about how you feel and what happened in the past when things went wrong. And if something unpleasant happens, you don’t pretend it didn’t happen.
You’ve accepted that life goes on; that a good thing can come out of bad events.
So if you’ve changed for the better. This means that you’re more likely to be able to work things out.
6) You’re both willing to compromise
Want to know about another positive sign during separation that predicts reconciliation?
It’s when you both willingly compromise with each other.
You’re able to put aside the differences between you for the sake of your relationship.
If you look closely, your partner isn’t always right and you aren’t always wrong. You can see things from their point of view as well as from your own point of view.
Instead of making demands and putting pressure on each other, you’re willing to come to an agreement together.
All these are positive signs that you’ll be able to work things out.
7) You both take responsibility for your actions
This next positive sign during separation that predicts reconciliation is also a good one:
You’re both willing to take responsibility for your actions.
You don’t blame each other for what’s gone wrong in the relationship and you don’t point fingers at each other.
This behavior shows that you’re mature enough to accept what happened in the past and try to move forward.
It also shows that you have self-respect.
You may feel angry, hurt, or upset with your partner, but you don’t blame them for things they didn’t do.
You know that you both made mistakes in handling a situation, but you are willing to accept your part of the responsibility, even if it’s only a small part of the whole thing.
The same applies to your partner.
If they’re willing to take responsibility for their actions and admit their part of the blame, this is a really positive sign that your relationship might work out.
8) You constantly make excuses to talk to each other
Here’s the next positive sign during separation that predicts reconciliation:
You constantly make excuses to talk to your partner.
Although you or they may not admit it, you still want to talk to each other.
You find it hard to let go of your partner without another chance to have a relationship or without a chance to get back together.
You feel the need to express yourself and you’re willing to compromise and admit that maybe your perspective was wrong.
This is why you find it hard to let go of each other.
So what can you do in this situation? Re-spark your partner’s romantic interest in you.
I learned about this from Brad Browning. Thousands of men and women followed his advice to get their partners back after a period of separation, and they succeeded.
Would you like to make your partner want you back in their life again? Would you like to reconcile with them?
Watch this free video! In it, he’ll show you exactly what you can do to make your partner think about reconciliation, too, and do everything in their power to get you back.
It doesn’t really matter what caused your separation – or how much time has passed since you separated – he’ll guide you step by step to bring them back into your life right away.
Here’s a link to his free video again. If you really want to reconcile with them, this video will help you get started.
9) You still ask each other for advice
This is a big one!
The seventh positive sign during separation that predicts reconciliation is when you still ask each other for advice.
You’re willing to share your feelings and thoughts with your partner, even if you don’t always agree with them.
You feel comfortable talking to them without being afraid of making a mistake or of getting in trouble.
Of course, there are times when you will disagree with each other, but this doesn’t mean that you’re trying to avoid talking about what’s bothering you.
In turn, your partner also asks you for advice. You’ve become a good listener and you’re willing to give good advice in return.
So if you still ask each other for advice, this is a very positive sign that there is hope for reconciliation.
10) The physical attraction is still strong
Want to know about another positive sign during separation that predicts reconciliation?
It’s when the physical attraction is still strong between you.
If you don’t feel excited about each other and the physical attraction is gone, then it will be very difficult for you to get back together.
However, if this attraction hasn’t faded yet, then there is hope that it will grow even stronger after a while.
You see, sexual attraction is one of the strongest drivers in a relationship.
If you still feel that sexual attraction for one another, the chances of reconciliation are high.
But if you don’t feel any physical attraction anymore and your partner isn’t attracted to you anymore, then this is a really bad sign that you will never be able to work things out.
11) You often reminisce about the good times
When you and your partner meet or talk, you often reminisce about the good times.
You’re able to think back on the time that you had together and you can appreciate what a wonderful time it was.
This is a good sign that your relationship will survive separation and that there is hope for reconciliation.
You can do this by sharing your memories with each other, releasing certain feelings you’ve held back, and telling each other stories about the good times when you were together.
Now, this doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t focus on the negative things that have happened in the past as well.
But if you only focus on the negative things, your relationship will slowly fall apart and you’ll start arguing over everything again.
Fixing your problems is definitely a priority. But, if you and your partner often reminisce and talk of the good times you had together, there’s a chance that your relationship can survive separation.
And if it does, there is a good chance that you can make your relationship stronger than ever.
12) Your partner is jealous and you’re too
Look, if you can still make your partner jealous, it means that they’re still interested in you.
This is a good sign that your relationship can survive separation.
While jealousy is not a healthy emotion, it often indicates that you’re interested in the other person, even if you don’t want to admit it.
So if jealousy still exists in your relationship, there is hope that things will work out.
Here are a few signs of jealousy:
- Your partner shows signs of concern when you mention new people;
- They still check up on you from time to time;
- They display signs of both rational and pathological jealousy.
Now, these are just a few examples, but if your partner is doing any of these things, this shows that they’re still interested in you.
They want to win your attention and make their presence felt.
13) You still flirt with each other
Another positive sign during separation that predicts reconciliation is when you still flirt with each other.
You’re not afraid to show interest in one another and you know how to flirt in a healthy way.
This means that there is still a degree of trust in your relationship. And as you know, trust is one of the crucial ingredients in a strong relationship.
So even if you can’t commit to each other officially, there is still a good chance that your relationship will survive a separation.
Now, this doesn’t mean that you should immediately jump into a physical relationship after separation.
It’s still necessary to take things slowly and see how things go.
But even if you’re not physically intimate with each other, it’s still a good sign that there is hope for reconciliation.
14) You give each other enough space
Here’s another sign that predicts reconciliation:
You give each other enough space.
What led to your separation? Maybe you were both too clingy and you had a hard time giving each other enough space.
Maybe you wanted to spend all your free time together and you didn’t want to go out with other friends anymore.
Or maybe your partner didn’t want to spend any of their free time with you.
But whatever the case, giving each other enough space is a step in the right direction.
The more you can learn to be independent of each other, the more confident and self-assured you’ll become.
And when you’re confident and self-assured, there’s a high chance that your relationship will survive separation.
15) You still keep in touch with each other’s family and friends
Another positive sign of reconciliation is when you still keep in touch with each other’s family and friends.
Maybe this doesn’t seem like a big deal to you, but it’s great for the future of your relationship.
First of all, it shows that you still have a degree of contact with your partner’s family and friends.
As you know, family and friends play a very important role in relationships.
Second of all, it shows your partner doesn’t want to exclude you from their life.
If they did, they wouldn’t have any reason to keep in touch with your family or friends. So doing this shows that your partner still cares about you and wants to include you in their life.
16) You are still able to laugh together
Not necessarily in a big way, but you’re still able to laugh together.
This is a great sign that your relationship will stay strong even after you’ve had some differences and arguments.
Losing your sense of humor can be the beginning of the end for many relationships.
But when you’re able to laugh together, it shows that you have a sense of humor and everyone is in on the joke, even if they have different points of view on certain matters.
17) You are both actively working on solving your problems
Here’s another sign that predicts reconciliation and a strong relationship:
You are both actively working on solving your problems.
Sometimes, a separation is needed in order to work out a few differences. But if the two of you can work out your problems, then it’s a good sign that you’ll be able to reconcile.
So if you’re both actively working on solving your problems and your relationship is still strong, then don’t give up.
Keep working on it and you’ll eventually solve any differences that are getting in the way of your relationship.
Make sure your partner is as committed as you are to solving your problems.
18) You discuss each other’s needs
Although unpleasant, a separation can help bring things into perspective. You will have time alone to think about what you need in life and what you want out of a relationship.
Maybe you used to be totally opposed to living together and now you’ve changed your mind. Or maybe the opposite is true.
Either way, it’s healthy to discuss each other’s needs during a separation. In the end, you will have a greater understanding of each other. But it’s important that you’re both committed to working things out.
And this commitment should be mutual and fair. You both deserve to be happy and healthy in your relationship, right?
What is the average length of separation before reconciliation?
The average length of separation before reconciliation is 7 to 8 months.
But not all couples take this long to reconcile. Some couples reconcile even sooner. And some couples never get back together.
It really depends on how long you’ve been together, how serious your relationship was, how both of you handled the split and how you dealt with your emotions.
All these factors are important.
If you’ve been together for a while, you have more experience to draw on. But if you only dated for a short time, it may not be as easy to reconcile.
Some couples do better at handling their emotions than others. But if you handle your emotions in a healthy way, then it’s easier to reconcile.
During separation, you may still be feeling some negative emotions. So if you’re not already in a healthy place, then it can take a long time to get there.
But if you handle your emotions in the right way, then it’s easier to get over the negative feelings and move on.
If you have different ideas or expectations of your relationship – like marriage and/or children – then it can take longer to reconcile because these things can’t just change overnight.
When should you give up on separation?
There really is no set rule for deciding when it’s time to give up on separation. You have to go by a gut feeling of when the time is right for you.
Do you feel that your relationship will get back to where it was before? Have you both worked out all your problems and feel positive about the future of your relationship? Or are you still having a hard time and don’t feel there’s any hope?
These are the kinds of questions you need to ask yourself. And you’ll need to be honest with yourself. If you have doubts, then it’s probably not the right time to give up on separation.
If you’re unsure, then it’s a good idea to wait a little longer.
A separation can be an emotional and painful experience, but also a positive one. You get to take some time alone to think and evaluate your relationship.
You can decide if you want to reconcile and move forward or whether you’re ready to move on and end the relationship for good.
There’s no right or wrong answer. You will have to make this decision yourself. But if you use the 18 signs above, it will be easier for you to know if reconciliation is possible in your situation.