When you find yourself in a relationship with someone, you might think it will last forever. But after 5 months, relationships tend to die so fast.
I have been there. It’s funny that my 7 relationships end in three months. At that time, I wasn’t sure why, but all of it happened in three months, and everyone ended up in a bitter break up.
That’s why I had to do some reflection…
So what is happening? What’s going on here?
These are the 10 most common explanations for why relationships seem to fall apart after five months.
1) It becomes difficult to share each other’s interests and goals
I’m sorry to say this, you might love your partner, but if you have different interests and goals, then it’s probably best to break up and move on.
You don’t want to be in a relationship where your partner is always trying to drag you away from what you love doing.
For example, if one of you loves traveling and exploring new places, but the other prefers to stay home most of the time and live a more sedentary lifestyle, then it’s probably not going to work.
If you want to travel the world and see and do everything there is to see and do, but your partner wants to stay home and lead a more quiet life, then you might want to end things before it gets too serious.
You don’t want to be in a relationship where one or both parties feel trapped or like they have to give up something they love.
2) The ex factor
We all have exes, and we all know that when you date someone new, your exes will always come up at some point.
I hate to say it, but it’s a fact of life.
It’s not something you should necessarily avoid — it’s just part of the dating experience.
However, if you have been with your partner for more than a little while and that ex comes back into the picture…well, this is obviously a problem!
It can be hard on any new relationship if an ex resurfaces after a few months or even years into the relationship. It can be hard on the ex as well.
And it can only lead to problems and nothing good.
Remember that some people are so attracted to their ex that they will fight every inch of the way and try to pull you back with them in their clutches, even if they know that you have a new girlfriend or boyfriend now.
3) Boredom and lack of attraction
It’s one of the common reasons why your relationships end so quickly.
If you don’t feel any sort of attraction or connection to your partner, then it may be the reason why things end.
It can be hard being with someone you’re not attracted to that much, especially if one or both members of the couple aren’t into it as well. If you’re feeling bored and like there is no hope for this relationship, then maybe it’s better to end things before they start getting serious.
I believe that when you love someone, it’s very difficult to find boredom. You will always want to spend time with them, but if you feel there is no attraction or sexual chemistry after just a few months of dating, then it’s a clear sign that you two are not meant to be together.
4) You have nothing in common
What do we mean?
We all have a lot of things we can talk about and a lot of things we are interested in. But if you and your partner have nothing to talk about or no common interests, then it might be the reason for the break up.
If the lack of common interests is extreme, though, then there might be a solution for this — you just need to find other things to bring you both together.
You might want to take a short trip together somewhere or create funny memories that you can tell each other about later on.
A lack of in common isn’t usually an issue if it’s early on in the relationship. But if it’s been more than 5 months already and nothing seems to bridge the gap, then you might want to reconsider.
5) You want different things in life
If you want different things in life, it’s going to be difficult for your relationship to work.
Some people want kids and others don’t. You need to be able to respect each other enough to acknowledge this and do what is right for each person.
If one of you wants kids, but the other doesn’t, then sometimes it’s best to just break up and part ways rather than trying it out and having conflict over something that should not matter as much as love.
My current relationship also faced the same problem. But I’ve found this course of a shaman about how to get to the root cause and resolve relationship problems such as partners wanting different things in life.
In the course – the free Love and Intimacy video by the world-renowned shaman Rudá Iandê, the shaman didn’t try to convince my partner that he should have kids, but rather encouraged him to see what he wants in life.
In this way, I think the relationship has been able to survive and not get into too much conflict and arguments.
Rudá doesn’t smooth things over, he gets real, and he digs deep into the relationship you have with yourself and how it impacts the relationships you have with others.
So if you’re ready to finally overcome your problem, check out his incredible free video here.
6) Money troubles
Why does this happen?
Money is one of the biggest reasons relationships fail. Money woes can lead to a lot of arguments and fights, and nobody wants to spend their time with someone they’re fighting all the time.
It’s not always about something big and fancy like a house or a car. Sometimes, it’s just about paying the bills and buying groceries.
Money problems are stressful, and if you don’t have enough to put food on the table or pay for your utility bills, then this can cause stress in the relationship.
Money problems can also cause fights and disagreements that lead to breakups if they are not resolved quickly and carefully.
The result?
If you’re struggling to make ends meet and your partner has a problem supporting both of you financially, then this can be a bit of a problem.
And if either one or both parties in the relationship are not willing to help out or do their share, then this can cause issues.
This is why it’s so important that you find out what each other wants from the relationship before getting officially committed for good.
7) Differences in cultural background and differences in lifestyle choices
We all have different backgrounds and come from different places.
If you and your partner have a lot of differences in cultural background or lifestyle choices, then this can also be a problem.
And if one of you doesn’t like to go out or party with friends for example, but the other does it all the time, then there’s bound to be some conflict. You probably want someone who is willing to compromise and make adjustments so that both parties are happy with the relationship and life together.
It’s not easy building a life together when there are too many differences between the two of you.
But if you want to be happy in your relationship, then you need to work through the issues that are keeping you apart and having problems.
There are many great ways of doing this, such as by working through the issues in a relationship help workshop with Rudá Iandê’s the free Love and Intimacy video.
8) Lack of communication skills and emotional sensitivity
Most relationships start off as good friends, but over time they become more intimate and emotional.
If there are not enough emotional sensitivity and communication skills between the two of you, this can cause problems.
Relationships we have with people we love are far more important than anything else in our lives.
It’s a huge mistake to make if you don’t pay attention to the needs and feelings of your partner in the relationship.
If you aren’t around all the time, show how much you care about them and are willing to do whatever it takes to make their lives better, then it’s likely that they will not feel this way about you.
If they avoid talking or they seem uninterested, then this is probably not a good sign.
If they are not willing to communicate with you, then there might be something wrong.
I would recommend working on your communication skills before you get into a relationship. Try to become a person who is open and honest with yourself and others, so that when you do have a relationship, it’s not an issue because of this.
9) One of you is dishonest
Well, it’s true.
This is a huge problem when it comes to relationships and is one of the most common problems in relationships.
If you cannot trust what your partner says, then this can cause a lot of problems and cause you to leave the relationship.
Trust is something that you must learn as you grow up and in your life, as well as in any relationship. Without trust, it’s next to impossible for a relationship to work.
If you or your ex lies about anything important or uses lies to hide problems that need to be worked out in order for the relationship to work, then this will usually mean that no good can be done with the relationship.
You cannot grow a strong relationship when one of you lies and the other is blind to it.
Honesty is something that we need to learn in order to make our relationships work.
10) Sexual incompatibility
If you don’t want the same things sexually, then this can lead to a breakup.
No one wants to be in a relationship where they feel uncomfortable during sex or where they feel the need to fake orgasms.
If your partner suggests having sex when you are not in the mood or never want to do it, then you might want to reconsider what this relationship is worth.
Sex is super important in any relationship because it’s how we release our sexual energy and it’s how we connect with one another.
So if you aren’t sexually compatible, then there’s probably not much that can be done about this unless both parties make adjustments to the relationship.
What should you do?
First, you should try to identify exactly what the problem is.
Is it something that can be fixed or are you just making excuses for the issues in the relationship?
The most important thing to do is to make sure that you know what your partner needs from the relationship.
Ask them what it is that they want from a relationship and how they think the relationship should be.
If you are willing to work through the problems and resolve them then this will help bring any problems in the relationship closer together.
I want to share some tips to help you with this.
1) Have difficult conversations early on
If you find that you have a problem or something that is bothering you in the relationship, then don’t wait until later to talk about it.
This will only make the issue worse and can cause serious damage to your relationship.
Talk about it early on so that you can fix whatever it is before it gets any worse.
2) Be honest in the relationship
If there is something that you think your partner needs to know, then tell them.
This can be tough because you may not want to hurt their feelings or embarrass them, but they will learn a lot more if they are honest with you.
If they are not willing to be honest, then it’s likely that the relationship will not work with issues like this.
Be as honest as possible about what is bothering you and what issues need to be worked out before things can get better and stronger.
3) Don’t try to change your partner
If your partner is unwilling to work with you to fix the problems in the relationship or convince them of anything, then it’s not possible for the relationship to get better and stronger.
Not everyone can or wants to change and this is not something that you can control. It’s important that both partners work together and try to agree on what it is that they want from a relationship.
If they are unwilling to accept this, then there’s no point in trying because they will always be different people by themselves.
4) Make sure that you are on the same page
It’s important that you and your partner both want the same things from a relationship.
Being clear with each other about what it is that you want can help strengthen your
relationship and make it last much longer than it would have otherwise.
This can be difficult because not everyone knows what they want at first and this is ok as long as you both agree to work through it so that there’s no conflict in the future.
5) Get advice specific to your situation
If you need help with a specific problem or issue in the relationship, then talk to someone who is qualified to help.
This can be difficult because it should not be necessary to seek out advice from other people.
However, if it keeps happening and you’re not sure what it means, then talk to someone about it so that you can figure out what is going on.
I’ve mentioned above that I’ve also had the same issues, my relationships repeatedly couldn’t last 3 months. That is when I was put in touch with one of the coaches at Relationship Hero. They deal with all matters of love and were able to help me work through my issues.
Not only did my coach blow me away with her kindness and understanding, but she also helped me to understand the reasons why my relationships were falling apart.
After working on my issues with her, I’ve been able to find myself and love much easier that way and I’m able to attract the right people into my life.
6) Be open-minded about what your partner wants from the relationship
Different people want different things in life, so it’s important that we do everything we can to accommodate their wishes as much as possible.
Try to avoid making your partner feel like they are being taken advantage of by you.
This is hard because we often want to feel loved and accepted, but as long as you are kind and generous with them, then they will know that you care about them and this can help bring love into the relationship.
You might also need to try to be less controlling in the relationship if you have these types of issues with your partner.
7) Be yourself and don’t try to change for everyone else
Whatever you do, don’t try to impress people or try to be someone else just to make them like you.
If that is what your relationship is about, then it could be pointless in the long term because some people won’t appreciate it.
You need to focus on yourself and what you want from a relationship and make sure that your partner does too.
If the relationship doesn’t work out, then breaking up is the best choice!
Trust me, if your relationship is based on things like this, then it will never last.
There’s no point in trying to make a relationship work if you’re not really into it in the first place. If you don’t have much respect for yourself, then your partner will feel this too.
Understanding yourself and what you want in a relationship can help you decide if you are compatible with your partner or not.
If both partners are willing to work together and make sacrifices for each other, then this can help strengthen any issues that may come up in the future.
It’s important that you take the time to evaluate your relationship regularly.
This will prevent you from wasting your time on a relationship that is not working out because you may not have realized it until later or never would have known if you hadn’t evaluated it regularly.
If things are going wrong, then you may want to consider breaking up with your partner and finding someone else to be with instead because it does get hard over time.
Breakups are hard, but they can be even harder when you do it for the wrong reasons or when the breakup is unexpected.
Avoid these pitfalls so that you can focus on what you want in the future and avoid wasting your time on someone who does not understand what you need from a relationship.
You can make things better for yourself by using some of the advice in this article.
If the relationship doesn’t work out, then it is still worth it to make a break up as smooth as possible.
By expecting the best and being willing to put in the effort, you are more likely to find someone good.
Conclusion
I hope that this article has inspired you to take control of your life and get the relationship you want.
If you want to grow as a person and improve your life, then you should be reading things like this often because they can help you in many different ways.
Life is so much more than just getting by on a daily basis and it’s important that we don’t let outside pressures affect us or keep us from being happy with our current situation.
If we focus on what makes us happy, then we can effectively make our lives better and stronger.
You can use all of the tips I have provided in this article to start off on the right foot with your future relationship. Besides, you can get help from the relationship coach I mentioned before.
My coach was incredibly supportive and empathetic. Her methods were powerful enough to help get my relationship back on track, against all the odds.
So, if you’d like to overcome your problem, don’t wait until it’s too late – get the advice you need and get back to being happy in your relationship.
