As if winter wasn’t frigid enough, being in a long-distance relationship (LDR) can make those frozen nights feel extra cold without your partner-in-crime to watch Netflix til your eyes bleed. True, absence can make the heart grow fonder, and when you do see each other, you feel like a kid at Christmas. However, the truth of the matter is that “baby, it’s cold outside” just doesn’t cut it when you’re by yourself for those short days and long, long nights. Let’s face it, being in a long distance relationship in winter sucks, especially in the winter.
Here are some tips to help numb the pain of your LDR and make sure you keep that flame between you lit – even if winter is the absolute worst:
1. Make Sure You Both Communicate Clearly
In LDRs, communication sometimes is the only outlet you have to share your day with your main squeeze. While you also need physical touch, keeping your communication lines open and transparent will help compensate for those nights apart that might otherwise be difficult. Communicating entirely in emojis might not be the best idea to get your words and feelings across. Clear communication will help you stay in tune with your partner and what’s happening in their lives.
2. Make Never-Miss Appointments to Talk to Each Other via Skype or Facetime
Just as important as it is to communicate clearly, it’s also necessary to do so in a way that you can connect – almost physically – with your love. Skype or Facetime may not offer exactly the same comfort as a warm shoulder to cuddle while it’s snowing outside, but it will remind you of the little things you love about your mate – his left dimple, the way she throws her head back when she laughs. You’ll be reminded of the things that make your love wholly and uniquely one-of-a-kind, and yours.
3. Try to Avoid Serious Exchanges on Social Media
It seems this third tip is also tied to communication – have you caught the hint yet? While we all love to update our relationship status and tweet our latest couple selfies, keep the serious and meaningful talk off those airwaves. It somehow waters down the importance of words to your partner, and makes them less personal since they’re accessible and readable to all. You know the statuses you’d rather not see, that constantly invade your newsfeed? It never ends well. Don’t make that mistake in your wintery wilderness of loneliness only to regret it the next morning.
4. Plan What You’ll Do the Next Time You See Each Other
Wondering when is the worst, especially for LDRs. Having a concrete date, even if it isn’t 100 percent confirmed, and talk about what you’ll do. It will give you both something to look forward to and make the time pass faster. Think about setting a countdown on your phone or via email. It’ll be fun to see the days dwindle down, and give you daily reminders of the exciting moments ahead – maybe even enough excitement to fight off those blizzard blues.
5. Send Love Notes or Random Thoughts Via Text
Again, we’re back to communication. There are so many different ways to do so these days, and it’s important to understand the appropriate situations for each avenue available to you. Sometimes, this can mean the difference between your partner feeling loved or neglected, as well as avoiding unnecessary misunderstandings. Use texting only for passing thoughts throughout the day, never long, deep conversations. If you keep it at that, long spaces between responses won’t bother you. It’s also a great way to say good morning and good night – and of course, a great way to add a bit of spice from time to time with a “sexty selfie” they’ll appreciate.
6. Got Something Else on Your Mind? Send an Email Instead
This is an especially nice change from drab work emails. Make a habit of it and send each other daily jokes. It will become one of your own private moments to share just between the two of you, and it’ll also give you a laugh in the process – something we all need when it’s minus 1 million degrees outside. Remember though, emails still really aren’t the place for deep conversations. Save that for phone or Skype convos, where there is less chance of misunderstanding.
7. Send an Actual Letter Via Snail Mail
Mail, oddly enough, has really become quite the novelty. Getting something from the mailman other than a bill hardly ever happens. Brighten your honey’s day with a sweet note with photos inside or a story of a favorite memory together. You can even look into some fancy stationary that is reserved solely for communication with each other. You’ll look forward to the post every week.
8. Make and Keep Rituals
If you build things to share just between the two of you – like jokes, letters or special goodnight chats – you’ll still maintain a closeness from miles away. Be creative. Whether you decide to have one-pot meal Mondays or HBO Binge bi-weekly dates, keep traditionsThere are so many options out there, you’re sure to find something that suits you both. You can watch a movie together, read the same book or recap your favorite TV show at the same time every week. Whatever it is, if you build it together, the ritual will belong completely and entirely to you – winter or no winter.
9. Remember Your Partner Is an Individual, Too
Maybe one of the hardest things to manage in a LDR is remembering your significant other still has a life – even outside of your phone conversations and daily rituals. Just remember to respect that. They are independent humans that will go out and do things without you, so don’t make them feel sorry or guilty. Encourage them. You’ll make them happy for maintaining their own independence, and you’ll empower them to be the best version of themselves they can be. It’ll probably be reciprocated, too.
It’s no joke, winter really is the worst, but your LDR doesn’t have to suffer for it. If you remember that the overall key to success is communication, you may find yourself cozying up by the fire only to find the cold weather over and spring on the way – along with your sugar pie honey bunch.
Megan Wild is a 2 year LDR expert (or at least would like to think she is) and loves writing, reading, and warm weather. When she’s not being an introvert, you can find her walking her dog and updating her blog, Your Wild Home.
