There’s nothing more awkward than being afraid of broaching the subject with a potential love interest, only to find out later that she has multiple partners.
If you’re dating someone new and you’re not sure if she has another partner or not, there are some telltale signs that may give away their situation.
I will show you 15 ways to tell if a woman has multiple partners, so keep reading!
1) Her phone is constantly buzzing with unknown numbers and unfamiliar names
If a woman has more than one partner, she’ll often find herself juggling several different relationships at once.
As a result, her phone will probably be buzzing with numbers and names that you don’t recognize.
If she’s getting a lot of calls and texts from people you don’t know, there’s a good chance that they’re her other partners.
If the woman doesn’t want you to know who they are, she’ll probably see it coming and let it go to voicemail.
Think about it: if she doesn’t want to be found out, she’ll probably just ignore the call.
Now: this sign only really works well if you know this woman a bit already and you can tell that those names are not people she hangs out with a lot in her daily life.
In a completely new relationship, it could be that they are simply friends she hasn’t mentioned yet.
So: what can you do in that situation?
It is tricky, to be honest! If you ask her about it and she truly has multiple partners, she might just lie to you and tell you that they’re all friends.
In that case, you’ll need to use another sign to confirm your suspicions.
I wouldn’t recommend snooping through her phone or trying to look up/ call one of the numbers yourself.
Think about it: if that is how your relationship is starting out, how will it be further down the line?
I know that it’s tempting, but try to resist!
2) She has a lot of ‘friends’ she never introduces you to
If your partner is polyamorous, she’ll probably have a lot of friends that she sees on a regular basis that you don’t really know.
That’s because they’re her other partners.
These are the friends who will go on road trips with her or spend the night at each other’s houses.
If you’re curious about who they are, look at the people who are in all of her pictures or the ones that she tags in social media posts.
Sure, they might just be friends, but there is also a chance that some of them are people she is a bit closer with.
She just doesn’t want to introduce you to them yet because she doesn’t want you getting jealous about it.
If you notice this sign, ask your partner if there is anyone else there when she goes out with these friends and what their names are- if she lies about it or is hesitant to tell you, then it’s very likely that they are her other partners and not just regular buddies.
Again, if the relationship is very new, this is not a sign I would worry about too much.
It takes time to introduce your partner to every single one of your friends, and sometimes, you want to be really sure about them before telling all your friends.
So before you go accusing her of anything, think about this first.
But if you’ve been dating for a couple of months and you’re still not sure about some of her friends, then it’s time to start asking about them.
3) You talk to a relationship coach about it
While this article explores the main signs that a woman has multiple partners, it can be helpful to speak to a relationship coach about your situation.
With a professional relationship coach, you can get advice specific to your life and your experiences…
Relationship Hero is a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations, like cheating. They’re a very popular resource for people facing this sort of challenge.
How do I know?
Well, I reached out to them a few months ago when I was going through a tough patch in my own relationship.
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I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.
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4) She has multiple social media accounts
There are a lot of polyamorous people who don’t tell their partners that they have multiple partners.
Instead, they just create a new account on one of the big social media sites and use it only to talk to their other partners.
This is a good way to hide your polyamory from your partner if you think that they won’t be supportive of it at all.
It’s also a good way to prevent them from finding out about your other relationships before you feel like you are ready for them to know.
The best way to find out if this is happening is by seeing if she has multiple social media accounts.
I know that sounds like an invasion of privacy, but I’m not saying look through your phone, simply see if for example on Instagram, you can see her profile photo in the bottom right corner – that’s a sign that she is logged into multiple accounts.
Then just ask her about it in a joking way – like “Oh, you’re one of those people with a Finsta?”
Usually, if it’s an account for friends or just something else, she will show you! Unless she has something to hide, of course…
5) She constantly talks about other men
If a woman has other partners, she might mention them casually without saying that she slept with them.
Simply put, if she’s sleeping with other men, she’ll probably have a lot of conversations with you where she talks about other guys.
If you’re dating someone new, and she seems to be fixated on other men, I’m sorry but she’s probably not that into you.
She may be telling herself that she deserves to have other partners because she’s so amazing.
If she’s constantly talking about other guys, she may not be as single as she claims to be.
You see, when a woman truly likes a man and wants to commit to him, other men become uninteresting to her.
It just doesn’t make sense for someone to talk about other men all the time if she’s into you.
If you’re dating a woman who is constantly talking about other men, it will probably be a good idea to talk about this and potentially end the relationship.
6) She takes forever to respond to your text messages
If a woman has multiple partners, she’ll often struggle to keep up with all of the different relationships in her life.
Because of that, she may take a long time to respond to your text messages.
If she’s juggling multiple partners, she probably doesn’t have a lot of time to text you back right away.
She’s probably got a lot of different people who are demanding her attention.
If a woman takes more than a few hours to respond to your text messages, she may have another partner.
However, I would be very careful with this sign.
Some women are simply busy or just don’t text a lot.
The only way to know for sure is if she tells you that she has another partner.
Or, if you happen to see her texting with another man right in front of you!
Now: there is a pretty easy way to find out what is going on here.
Is this woman constantly on her phone while you’re together, yet when you’re apart she takes hours to respond?
Well, I’m sorry to break it to you, but then she’s really not that interested in being with you!
If you’re dating a woman who is constantly on her phone and doesn’t pay attention to you and also never replies, then she’s probably not that into you.
7) She’s incredibly flirty
If a woman has multiple partners, she may have a very flirtatious nature.
So; if you’re dating someone new, and she seems incredibly flirty with everyone that she meets, she may be trying to keep other guys interested in her.
She may be keeping all of her relationships casual so that she can have her pick of partners whenever she wants them.
If a woman is flirting with everyone that she meets, she may not be as single as she claims to be.
Now: this is something that can be addressed eventually, especially if it makes you feel uncomfortable.
Think about it: when you start seriously dating someone and they flirt with other people right in front of you, it shows a lack of respect.
If you’re with a woman who is flirting with other men, then she’s probably not that into you.
But then again, some women are just naturally flirty without even trying!
Some women are just go-getters; they like to make things happen, and they like to be social.
They might not even realize that they’re flirting with other people; it’s just their nature.
I’m not saying that you need to break up with her, but this is something that you should keep in mind and address if it makes you uncomfortable.
If a woman is constantly flirting with other men when she’s out in public, then she may have other partners as well.
8) She displays a lack of respect for your time and your feelings
If a woman has multiple partners, she may not respect your feelings or your time.
She may feel like she can do whatever she wants and it doesn’t matter what you feel about it.
Or, she may feel like it’s okay to ignore or avoid you.
You see, since she has other men in her life, why should she care if you’re upset?
This means that she might ditch you a bunch of times, not show up to dates on time, or simply just doesn’t care about your feelings.
If a woman is disrespectful towards your feelings and shows a lack of respect for your time, then she probably doesn’t have much respect for herself either.
9) There are things in her apartment that don’t belong to her
If you notice that there are things in the woman’s apartment that don’t belong to her, she may have other partners.
If she has a drawer full of condoms (bonus points if they’re already in the trash and definitely don’t belong to you), or other stuff that clearly belongs to men, she may have other partners.
You see, if a woman lives alone or with other women, there is not really a reason for there to be men’s things in her room, right?
Especially when you notice that there seems to be more than one thing that definitely belongs to some guy that isn’t you, I would definitely talk about it!
The thing is, if you are getting serious with this woman, it is also about your safety, not just your feelings.
When she lets you believe she only sleeps with you while in reality having sex with a bunch of other men, that can increase your risk of getting an STD!
I would recommend having a talk with her about it, and if she starts to get defensive or makes up excuses, then that is a huge red flag.
10) She’s overly hesitant to commit
If you’re dating someone new and she seems incredibly hesitant to commit, she may have other partners.
Everyone has their own timeline for when they want to get into a serious relationship.
If she seems hesitant to commit, there are two options.
Sometimes, she’s just not ready to jump into a serious relationship.
She may just be taking her time and trying to figure out what she wants.
You see, some people are also just traumatized from past experiences and want to take things really slow before committing to a whole relationship again.
However, if she’s hesitant to commit, there’s a chance that she has other partners.
She may not be ready to commit to one person until she’s figured out what she wants from all of her other relationships.
When things get more serious, that is usually when you start to open up about these kinds of things, so she might mention to you how she is scared of commitment.
If there is no proper excuse for her hesitation, it might be time to let it go.
11) She doesn’t want you to meet her friends or family
If a woman has other partners, she may not be ready to introduce you to the people who are closest to her.
If she’s dating someone new and she doesn’t want to introduce you to her friends or family, she may have other partners.
Think about it: she may want to keep her relationships with other people private.
Or who knows, maybe you are not the main partner, and her official boyfriend is someone else?
Okay, before you overthink this too much, there are countless reasons for a woman not to introduce you to her family.
One of them is that she doesn’t have a good relationship with them, or maybe they are super strict, or she had a bad experience in the past.
Whatever it is, if you gently touch on the subject, she might open up to you about it.
If a woman doesn’t want to introduce you to her friends or family and doesn’t tell you why there’s a good chance that she has other partners.
12) She always has an excuse not to meet up
If you’re dating someone new and she always has some sort of excuse not to meet up with you, she may have other partners.
A woman who is dating multiple people simultaneously may try to avoid spending too much time with any one of her partners.
If she’s seeing other people, she probably doesn’t want her other partners to know about each other.
Think about it: next to having a job and seeing her friends, balancing multiple partners is pretty hard!
As a result, she might not have a lot of time to spend with you.
Now: if your girlfriend is always busy, she might also just be in over her head with work, listen to what she says, and if her words seem to line up with her actions!
So, when a woman always has an excuse not to meet up with you, there’s a good chance that she has other partners, but she might also just be busy.
13) She loves to go out and party
If a woman is dating more than one person and she’s trying to keep those relationships under wraps, she may want to make sure that she has plenty of opportunities to be social.
She may be trying to keep her other relationships casual by dating people who are out of town or not interested in a serious relationship.
If the woman you’re dating loves to go out and party, she may be dating multiple people and trying to keep those relationships casual.
Now: just because a woman likes to go to the club or go out is not a sign in and of itself that she has multiple partners or is likely to cheat.
However, it does increase her chances of doing so exponentially.
You see, this is especially true if she goes out and doesn’t want you to tag along.
Think about it: people either go out alone with their friends and meet potential partners, or they go out with their partners to have fun.
14) She likes to drink a lot
If the woman you’re dating likes to drink a lot, she may have multiple partners. Okay, that’s another one you have to be careful with.
As with the partying, it is not a sign in and of itself that she cheats.
But being drunk a lot means that her chances of cheating are higher than normal.
Because if she is drunk, she is more likely to make bad decisions that she normally wouldn’t make.
The same goes for being high on drugs.
So, if your girlfriend drinks a lot or does other drugs, be careful but don’t jump to conclusions!
15) She has a ton of friends who are also dating multiple people simultaneously or have multiple partners themselves
Okay, this one is tricky!
When you start dating someone new and you notice that a lot of their friends are also dating multiple people simultaneously, it can mean two things: either they all like to date around (and they’re just not very good at hiding it from you), or she is simply very different from her friends.
One thing is for sure though: if all of her friends cheat in one way or another, odds are she does too!
Notice how she reacts and responds to her friend’s stories about cheating. Does she condone it?
Now: this does not mean that every person with multiple partners will have other friends who cheat as well.
That’s obviously not true at all!
But it does mean that her chances of cheating go up exponentially when she has friends who cheat as well and they all condone it with each other.
So keep an eye out on this one!
You see, if she sees nothing wrong with her friends cheating on their partners, what makes you think she sees your situation differently?
Watch out for yourself but don’t be paranoid
I tried really hard to make it clear that almost none of these signs on its own is a neon sign for cheating.
You see, for all of these, there could be explanations and innocent backgrounds.
However, if you notice that a few of these signs seem to start building up, then it’s time to watch out!
Have a conversation with her and try to talk to her about your concerns!
