“i need to find myself”

6 years, not even 1 breakup during that time. a long sms the day of our 6th anniversary saying i was the love of his life and he can’t be better with me. he went to a trip after, bought me a lot of stuff, a lot of sms saying how much he missed me. he arrived on sunday, my birthday was on friday and he decided to make this huge party, beautiful, for me, at his place. a lot of people, a lot of fun. that night, when he was saying goodbye, he didn’t want to kiss me…that was weird. next day, he came to my place, didn’t say a word. sat down far away from me at the sofa…he left to his place and i sent a sms: if you are coming to my place with that attitude, please don’t come, it hurts…then i receive an other sms saying that he needed to find himself…really? after 6 years, you breakup on a sms??i, very easygoing and stupid, said: take the space and the time you need. i became a puppet! he came whenever he wanted, but no when i wanted it…he sent me more sms with hearts, kisses, roses, blah blah, but when i wanted to talk, he didn’t replay…i waited for 9 months. he several times came to my place saying: i love you, you know it, just give more time. oooh, i know, lets have a baby, that would fix the problem…what???? the love of my life that brokeup with me, now is saying that he wants a baby, but i need to give him more time…after 9 months, one day, i found out one my exes died…i came to the funeral, and his mom, that never actually met me said: i know you…and she hugged me, then she whispered: he loved you so much, for so many years, i know who you are because he still has a picture of you in his room. after 7 years!! he still had a picture of me!! to see me everyday…and i was begging for love to someone that didn’t love me back?? that day i said to him: i’m done…i deserve someone that loves me for real, somebody just did that, for 7 years, and i didn’t see it…and now i lost him forever. since that day, i don’t know a word from him…that was almost 2 years ago.