Growing up in somebody’s shadow is not a fun experience. Most of the time, you don’t put yourself there, but are instead put there by people who refuse to acknowledge individuality and instead thrive off comparison- probably because they themselves do it constantly in their own lives. And that makes it all the more frustrating, because when they’ve made you feel so insecure, it’s nearly impossible to leap out of that shadow and be comfortable with yourself and where you’re at with your own accomplishments. I know how it feels firsthand – I grew up with a genius twin brother, who never failed to win awards or garner exceptional test scores. I was (and still am, I’d like to think) pretty smart myself, but because we were the exact same age, it was easy for other people to compare us, and my whole life up until college I felt unsatisfied with my own accomplishments, because they were never quite as celebrated as my brother’s. Unfortunately, this doesn’t just happen to twins, but to anyone and everyone with a sibling, a close friend, a rival/competitor, etc. When you’ve been bombarded with these comparisons to the point where your self-esteem is in the gutter, how do you break free from somebody’s shadow?
What would Rihanna do? While the Barbadian singer, songwriter and fashion designer has been nominated 200 times for multiple awards and has won 130 of those, she wasn’t always praised for being so unique and successful. Back in the 2006, after the release of her second album A Girl Like Me, Rihanna was heavily criticized by critics for being unoriginal, and for having a sound and style too similar to Beyonce’s. The comparison clearly got to her, as she later spoke out about it in an interview with Look magazine, in which she said, “Beyoncé is a great artist and I feel honored to be mentioned in the same sentence, but we’re different performers with different styles.” As an up-and-coming performer, implications that she was merely copying another performer’s style were probably disheartening, because it didn’t allow for people to see her as she truly was. We are all different, sometimes greatly, and sometimes only slightly- so we should never compare one person to another. As time went on, and Rihanna remained in the spotlight, people were able to better see the differences (and maybe even the similarities) and appreciate Rihanna for her own accomplishments and talents. Sometimes, time is all you need, but Rihanna also never let anyone put her in that Beyonce box. She stayed classy about it and she stayed true to herself, which is really all you can do, and eventually, others will come around. After all, Rihanna herself did say, “The bottom line is that everyone thinks differently.” Rihanna, Please Don’t Stop the great advice.
