In a society that pits women against one another (looking at you, media!) it’s no wonder that young girls struggle with finding confidence. We’re constantly bombarded with images and articles pushing forth the tacit idea that girls must fit into this standard of beauty- and that even the ones who do must fight with other girls who’ve been given an elevated position in society because of their socially-accepted beauty to stay in this position. And rarely do these girls have any actual confidence; it’s usually just carefully-disguised insecurity stemming from their place in this very competition, so young girls grow up believing that true confidence comes from other’s perception of them (and their investment in this battle), and then they don’t know the real secret to confidence. So how do we change the way girls see confidence, and see themselves?
What would Mindy Kaling do? While the award-winning actress, comedian and writer is no stranger to success and adoration, she has been very vocal about her own battles with self-confidence and self-love growing up in her new book Why Not Me?, and this is because, as she says, self-confidence does not depend on the amount of confidence society says you’re guaranteed. In fact, it depends on the amount of confidence you believe you’re guaranteed based on the work you put into your career, relationships, and self-care. If we wish to live in a society that prides itself on the superior health and true beauty of its young women, we’ve got to stop telling girls to listen to what other people (still looking at you, media!) say about how they should look or feel. After all, Mindy herself did say, “Listen to no one except the two smartest and kindest adults you know, and that doesn’t always mean your parents. If you do that, you will be fine.” We don’t doubt this method at all- Mindy is one fine, confident woman!