There’s a thin line between a healthy relationship and a toxic one.
The key?
Expectations.
Setting the right ones from the start can steer your relationship towards love and understanding.
In a healthy relationship, both parties should know what’s expected of them.
No mind games, no hidden agendas.
Just clear, honest expectations that guide the way you treat each other.
So, if you’re ready to nurture a relationship that’s based on respect and mutual understanding, let’s dive into these seven expectations you should be setting from day one.
1) Open communication
The foundation of any healthy relationship lies in clear and open communication.
Effective communication goes beyond just talking about your day.
It involves expressing your needs, desires, and feelings openly, and also being a good listener when your partner does the same.
Why is this so critical?
Because when you both understand each other’s perspectives, you can navigate conflicts better.
You’re able to empathize with each other, compromise more easily, and build a stronger bond.
So, from the start, make it a point to foster an environment of open communication.
Encourage each other to speak up, listen carefully, and respond with understanding.
2) Mutual respect
I’ve learned through personal experience that respect is the backbone of any relationship.
In my past relationship, my partner and I had different interests.
He was into fitness and loved his morning runs, while I was more of a night owl who loved binge-watching documentaries.
Initially, we’d tease each other about these differences.
But as time went on, the teasing took a turn for the worse and began to feel like disrespect.
I felt he didn’t respect my choices, and he felt the same about me.
It wasn’t until we sat down and discussed our feelings that things started to change.
We agreed to respect each other’s interests and give each other the space to enjoy them.
From then on, our relationship improved significantly.
So, take it from me – mutual respect is crucial.
Whether it’s about hobbies, choices, or opinions, ensure that you both respect each other from the start.
3) Trust and honesty
Trust is like the glue that holds relationships together.
Without it, even the strongest of relationships can crumble over time.
When you trust your partner, you feel secure.
You know they have your best interests at heart and won’t intentionally hurt you. It’s a feeling that fosters love and intimacy.
Honesty, on the other hand, is what builds trust.
Did you know that according to a study by the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, honesty can make you feel more peaceful, authentic and emotionally healthy?
So, if you want a healthy relationship, set an expectation of trust and honesty right from the start.
Always tell the truth, even when it’s difficult.
And trust your partner to do the same for you.
4) Quality time together
In the hustle and bustle of life, it’s easy to overlook the importance of spending quality time together.
But trust me, it’s an essential ingredient for a healthy relationship.
Quality time doesn’t necessarily mean doing extravagant activities together.
It can be as simple as cooking a meal together, watching your favorite movie, or just having a heart-to-heart conversation at the end of the day.
This shared time helps to strengthen your bond, understand each other better, and create lasting memories.
So from the start, make it a point to carve out time in your schedules just for each other.
Your relationship will thank you for it.
5) Emotional support
There was a time in my life when I was going through a rough patch.
I wasn’t just facing professional challenges, but personal ones too.
My world felt like it was falling apart and the stress was unbearable.
But my partner stood by me.
He listened when I needed to vent, offered comfort when I was low, and gave me strength to face my challenges.
He was my rock.
That’s when I realized the tremendous value of emotional support in a relationship.
It’s what gets you through the tough times and makes your bond stronger.
So, set the expectation of being there for each other emotionally, right from the start.
It’s a pillar of strength that every healthy relationship needs.
6) Personal space
While spending quality time together is important, so is having your own personal space.
It’s essential for personal growth and maintaining your individuality in a relationship.
Having your own space means having time to do things you love, pursue your interests, or just relax and rejuvenate.
It’s about respecting each other’s need for alone time.
A healthy relationship doesn’t mean you’re glued to each other 24/7.
It means you’re two independent individuals who choose to be together.
So, right from the start, set the expectation of respecting each other’s personal space.
It’s not just healthy, but necessary for a balanced and fulfilling relationship.
7) Equal partnership
In a healthy relationship, both partners are equal.
You make decisions together, share responsibilities, and respect each other’s views and opinions.
Equality means acknowledging that your partner’s feelings, thoughts, and aspirations are just as important as yours.
It’s about working together as a team.
This is the cornerstone of a balanced and fulfilling relationship.
So ensure that from the very beginning, you set the expectation of being equal partners in the journey of love and life.
It’s a two-way street
The essence of a healthy relationship lies in the mutual effort of two individuals.
These expectations aren’t just for your partner to meet, but for you to fulfill as well.
A relationship is like a mirror – it reflects back what you put into it.
A quote by American author, William Arthur Ward, puts it beautifully: “We can throw stones, complain about them, stumble on them, climb over them, or build with them.”
In the context of relationships, these ‘stones’ could be seen as expectations.
You have the choice to either stumble on them or build with them.
If you choose the latter, these ‘stones’ or expectations can lay the foundation for a beautiful and healthy relationship.
So reflect upon these expectations and see how you can integrate them into your relationship from the start.
It’s not just about setting these expectations but nurturing them with love, patience, and understanding.