Yes, it’s that time again. Time to take a look at the douchebags out there (and I don’t mean the kind you find at CVS) that we all inevitably end up dating at one point or another. Let’s take a look at some first date etiquette (or lack thereof) and decide if he’s a keeper, or a DB creeper.
Opening the door for you: Classic old school gentleman behavior. Who says chivalry doesn’t exist? This first date is going splendidly! You feel like a lady, or a princess even. You wonder if Prince William opens the door for Kate (they probably have someone hired to do that, you remember).
Rating: Keeper
Helping you to your seat: Wow, opening doors and now pulling your seat out for you?! Will he feed you grapes while you lie out on a hammock in the sun next? You are already daydreaming about dating this guy long term. Even if you’re at a dinky BBQ place where you order at the counter and it’s not technically a “date,” a guy pulling out the chair for you is likely to make you look at him differently (but c’mon, let’s aim for a real dinner date).
Rating: Keeper
Admiring your assets: Admiring is a pretty loose term here. We’ll use air quotes for it (I know I can use real quotes, but work with me). It’s one thing to say that you look very nice or he likes your dress, but it’s another to stare at your chest or, perhaps even go as far as asking your bra size (I wouldn’t say it if it never happens). This guy is interested in one thing only—I’d be surprised if he was even asking you to dinner.
Rating: Creeper
Not respecting your space: There is an acceptable distance people should be when speaking with you (I’m partially talking to you, old college professor that didn’t understand “personal space” or “bad breath”). If this guy can’t even read the signals if you don’t want him near, imagine what else he won’t be good at…
Rating: Creeper
Making you foot the bill: Ok, ok, we all know it’s 2015 and feminism and equality and all that. We aren’t saying you need to totally expect him to cover the bill (although personally if he’s the one who asked you out, he should), but that should not be totally on you. This guy is a boy, not a man, and obviously isn’t thinking or caring much about first impressions.
Rating: Prick
Point is ladies, you can’t always tell a keeper from a creeper before the first date and we know that—but make sure not to look past these telltale signs, no matter how hot he might be.
