On, those days when I really want the world to leave me alone, it’s rough because the world keeps turning; I just want time to stand still. The bed is my best friend. My sheets feel like the most tender lover, warm and inviting. Most importantly, they’re non judgmental. Many people have these days, some have them more than they would ever like to admit. It becomes a huge problem when this feeling lasts too long, and I just can’t seem to bring myself out of it. The longer I stay down, the harder it is to pull myself back up. These dark times that last days and days on end. When I finally find myself coming out of the dark, I am confronted with what seems like thousands of things that I let slip past me and now needed my immediate attention. Then guess what? I feel overwhelmed and that darkness slowly creeps back in or hits me like a wrecking ball between the eyes. The following are tried and true things that I do when enough just has to be enough.
Get Up
Get up. Simple right? No, not that simple. I am tired and my body hurts. My head throbs from not taking care of myself. Drinking a bottle of water and making a small, healthy meal goes a long way here. I have to pat myself on the back for this little step. I go slow and take some time to prepare my food, appreciating that I am preparing food that is good for me and not just reaching for readily available junk that I will be mad at myself for having later.
Shower and dress
Again, this may seem like a small step, but it takes a lot of effort. I carefully set out my clothes, shoes, and jewelry. I chose an outfit that makes me feel good and jewelry that I love, never leaving out a beautiful bra and panty set. We all know a little sexy never hurt anything. Lol It helps to feel good from head to toe. Now, when I take my shower, I enjoy it. I don’t rush it. I couple it with my favorite soap and music, and it is the most relaxing and enjoyable time of my day. After my shower, I take time to really pamper myself with lotions and perfume that make me feel like a Goddess. Then I dress in my carefully picked outfit. Hair and makeup are up next for me and help me pull it all together.
Pick One Task and Execute
At this point, I feel better physically, but when I walk around my home, I am quickly reminded that there are so many things that were ignored and put to the side while I was down and out. My mind is saying to do all of these things and do them NOW! That, however, is the absolute wrong thing to do. Trying to get everything done and not finishing it all will leave me feeling unaccomplished. So, the first thing I do is to take out a notebook and a pen and write a list of things that need to be done, breaking them down into small, manageable tasks. For example, that big pile of mail that has been accumulating and forming small mounds around my home. I go through it and take out all the junk that can be thrown away. Next, I separate bills from the other mail. Then, I open bills. Now, let me tell you in complete honesty, because of my financial situation, sometimes I ignore bills. Never in history has this ever done me any freaking good. So I open them up. I look at them. What can I take care of now? What needs to wait? Do I need to call and ask for extensions on anything? I address every bill individually. This leaves me with an immense feeling of accomplishment. I open up all other mail and do the same. Then address any issues or throw the mail away if it is not needed.
Clean Up
When I am depressed, you might as well tell me to vacuum up the beach. It is simply overwhelming.This helps me though. First, I turn on some of my favorite music. Now, personally, I like to rap. I can be incredibly loud and shake my booty. But for you, this music could be any genre. The most important thing is that it supplies a reason to be happy. Then I grab a timer. Usually, my cell phone does the trick, but it can be the one on your oven or wherever. I promise you, it will change your life. I set my timer for a half hour and start with the kitchen. Beginning with my table, I clean all of the surfaces, then the dishes. You will be amazed at how much can be done in just thirty minutes, I promise you. Typically, after thirty minutes of focused cleaning with booty shaking music (again, just my preference), I am either done or so close that it’s nothing to go ahead and finish. Next, I set a 15 minute timer for the bathroom, 20 minutes for the living room, and so on. It really reminds me that I do have time, especially when I feel overwhelmed. Also, it leaves me feeling all Superwoman-like; accomplished like a Boss!
And one more…
Take a break from Social Media
What I do to entertain myself really eats up time that I could be using to do things that make me feel good about myself. Also, let’s be honest, when I am down and feeling low, seeing people on Facebook or Instagram bragging about how awesome their lives are from some Caribbean island really doesn’t do a damn thing to make me feel better. So I let it go. I put my phone up and really give myself some time to focus. If you can’t put your phone up, logout. If it’s really hard for you, there are apps that lock you out of social media for a specified period of time. I’ll link you to a Mashable article below that lists six of them.
So for now, that’s it. That’s all I have. I am thankful that lately, talking about depression is becoming a little bit easier every day. I see celebrities talking about it in brutal honesty, and I see the phrase “Self Care” more and more.
In no way am I saying that everyone should be able to pull themselves out of their dark place. Talk to your doctor about it. Many of us, me included, may need therapy, but I find these steps to be a good way to start in the right direction on the road to living with depression.
